Wednesday, May 21, 2008

Missing my family

On May 1st the Reverend Dr. Sylvester Armour, after 80 years the last six in a paralytic state, passed from this life. Now that may not mean much to you but he was my Grandad and even though I had made peace ~or so I thought~ with his going, it knocked me for a loop. I could remember all the fun times when he took me and all the other grands to Geauga Lake. I remeber the rides on his home made motorcycle {it was the back of a VW Bug and the front wheel of a chopper}. It had five places for one of each of the grands to sit! I remember him giving us a weekly "allowance" just because. It makes me sad that my kids wont get to know that Grandaddy. They only know the sick man in the nursing home who they could hardly understand. I remember and thats the Grandad that I wasnt ready to let go. But I prayed for his soul and I prayed for ease of my grief. Granddaddy, I love and miss you....and I always will.
Some days I do ok. I go through the day caught up in the myriad details of caring for my family, in general. And then some thing brings you to mind, an old school song, a place we used to go, something we used to do, and its like the last two and a half years have not gone by. I miss you JUST AS MUCH as the day I found out you had been taken from us. My heart is just as heavy as the day I stood over your coffin and begged God to give you back to us. My eyes are just as full of tears as the day I watched them lower the coffin in the cold November earth. Thanksgiving 2005 just wasnt the same and will NEVER EVER BE. I miss and love you Tahnee, sister of my heart, and I always will.